I strive for balance. That delicate line between working too much and goofing off too much, worrying and throwing caution to the wind, eating chocolate or lettuce all day, family obligations or time for myself. It is called balance for a reason, many days it is like walking a tight rope over the Grand Canyon. (nearly impossible)
I have had a hard weekend. C came home late of Thursday night and I wanted to work Friday am (until noon) to get things accomplished in the workshop. So I got up uber early and met dad, and started. I was cranky, miserable, and just shouldn't have been down there. It ended with me just walking out of the shop, fearful if I spent any more time with any thing human or animal, I would do or say something I would regret for life.
Saturday I spent just a few hours, enough to finish up Friday's work, and then I needed a break. Dad and I have been going day after day since I returned on the 10th. Long days with no breaks. I have gotten so much done and I am proud of myself, but the lack of balance took its toll and my attitude needed an adjustment. Yesterday afternoon C and I talked about balance. He busted some myths that I had about him. He doesn't need me to cook ever day he is home (it is nice and appreciated, but not necessary). He would like for me to take weekends off if possible (or at least take it easy when he is home so we can spend time together),and it is OK for me to make plans and do things while he is home.
I know some of these things sound odd, but he travels for work. All. The. Time. Out on Mondays, home on Fridays, sometimes away for one or two weekends at a time as well. So when he is home, I try and plan around him. Make it special. Have his favorite meals, don't have plans with anyone but him, only work till Noon in the workshop (even if this means I have to get up at 4 am to get the day's work done). I figure that he deserves the time and attention since he is home so little. But one of the main reasons he comes home is to see me be happy (not just hear me be happy on the phone), so I need to do whatever will make me happiest.
So what I have done this week to relieve some stress is to sleep. I have been getting up very early, using my alarm clock to have things done in the workshop by Noon. It leaves me the rest of the day to do other stuff, like labeling, or paperwork. But I just don't do well waking up to an alarm clock day after day after day. I don't sleep well. I wake up multiple times in the night worried that the alarm hasn't or won't go off. So I am back to getting up when my body feels like it. Oddly , today that wasn't more than fifteen minutes past when my alarm would have been set for. But I already feel better. I am more relaxed. My body got to finish its sleep the way it wanted and needed to, and I can tell the difference. I naturally wake up pretty early, so it is not like doing this makes a huge difference. Most days I will still be done by 1 pm. But listening to my body is a huge part of my stress relief. So this was my little way to strive for some balance this week.
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