Dad Update- 11

I think the nights are the worst. Poor dad has always been one of those people who can't sit in one position for a long time without getting painfully stiff, painfully bored, and painfully cranky. Last night was a lot like the evening before the colonoscopy but without the passing out on the bathroom floor. Taking his meds without food brought on some nausea, and trying to get out of bed was so painful that in itself brought on some nausea. I was once again reminded exactly why I wish to be child-free- this getting up every two hours is for the birds. Laying there is bed he got stiff and sore, and then trying to get out of bed made him even more sore. After about 4 am we both finally got a few good hours of sleep and around 6 am got him out of bed and into a comfortable chair in the living room. I just couldn't sleep, I think it was the maternal, listening for sounds, for your name, or for that tell tale *thump* of passing out that keeps you suspended in a Zen like meditative trance rather than in a state of true deep sleep. There are portions of the evening that I know I only closed my eyes for 20-30 minutes, but I came to in a hyper awake, adrenaline filled state. This morning almost feels like a low. My eyes are sore, my body is tired, but my mind is awake and alert. Strange…

Dad Update- 10

Dad is home from his hernia surgery. The whole thing took about 5 hours from the time we arrived to the hospital to the time he was discharged to come home. Right now he's not in much pain, although that may have to do with the two Percocet he has been given. But the doctor said that the procedure went well, dad had no ill after effects from the anesthesia, and he's already had a bowl of soup since I got him home. He's not allowed to drive until the 15th and is supposed to keep the area iced (1/2 hour on and ½ hour off) during the day for the next week. Keeping the swelling down helps the healing from what I've been told, also, the least amount of swelling now in the first few days the less swelling and pain after he gets up on his feet again. We'll spend the rest of today watching DVD's- probably some CSI's and some of Ken Burn's Jazz documentary.

Week 29 Accomplishments

Well I finished almost all the soap I wanted to have made prior to my crazy August schedule. This week I made more Peppermint Foot Scrub, Into the Woods, Black Cherry Oatmeal, and Plumeria. I really just ended up about 200 bars short of my target, which isn't bad given all the time this past month that I haven't been able to get into the shop. I guestimated that I made about 4000 bars of soap in July. Along with 1200 lip balms, 500 lotion bars, 100 lip glosses, and about 50 bath salts…all I have left is bath fizzys to make this week.

I can really feel the stress getting to me this week. I am just not mentally ready for Musikfest. Part of it is Dad and knowing that I'll be at a show just a few days after his hernia surgery. I know he'll be fine at home for those few hours alone on Friday, and that if he is having any problems C will stay home with him over the weekend, but I'm really just a worrier about this kind of stuff. It's also coming up on the 1 year anniversary of my grandmothers death. I wish I could be with my mom during this time, but it just can't happen because of my schedule. Last year when we lost Nana, I had to have T cover my booth for a few days for the funeral, and I was lucky the show promoters had no problem with this. Some shows are really strict about having the artists present and that kind of stuff, and some don't care about family emergencies, they've heard it all before and always just think its an excuse.

This past week was just emotionally draining. I call it "close to the surface", like everything makes you cry, and you get all irrational about the smallest things, and you feel like you just got up on the wrong side of the bed, but you don't know how to fix it, and no amount of chocolate does it for you. I tend to get this way when work and life come together and get in the way of each other. I'm pretty good at dealing with one or the other, but both can be tough when you don't ever really leave the office, since the office is only your basement.

This week will be quiet. Just a few things to do each day to finish getting ready for my next few shows, I plan on lots of naps and helping dad as much as I can. I have lunch on Wed, and show set up on Thurs., and the show starting on Fri. I should have lots of updates this week.